<aside> <img src="/icons/heart_red.svg" alt="/icons/heart_red.svg" width="40px" /> Why They Want You to Stop Growing Your Confidence: The Real Reason Behind the Crab Mentality!

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💍 From First Date to Forever: How Reading Stop Everything! 🛑 This One Habit Will Change EVERYTHING (Hint: It Involves Patience) Led Me to "The One” even when I didn’t know how-to! from scot.live

1. Problem vs. Decision:

• Problems need solving, decisions need making. Many dating dilemmas feel like unsolvable problems, leading to overthinking. Is it a problem you can actually solve?
  • Example Problem: Your date is constantly late. This is solvable via communication and setting expectations.
  • Example Decision: You enjoy someone's company, but they're not looking for the same kind of relationship. This isn't solvable, it's a decision point - do their wants align enough with yours?
• Applying this helps you be more direct. Instead of agonizing over "what it all means" when someone's behavior is off-putting, frame it as:
  • "Is this a pattern I can address (problem), or a sign they're not the right fit (decision)?"

2. Relaxing (and Why It Matters):

• "Sphincter muscle" aside, being uptight is palpable. Dating involves vulnerability, and if you're tense (physically or mentally), it creates a barrier.
• This doesn't mean being someone you're not. It means finding ways to genuinely relax in the context of dating. This could be:
  • Pre-date routine: Calming music, a hot shower, whatever centers you.
  • Mindset shift: View it as two people seeing if they vibe, not a job interview.
  • Humor: Don't force it, but being able to laugh at awkwardness eases tension.

3. How This Makes You More Attractive:

• Decisiveness is attractive. Knowing when you're facing a problem vs. a decision makes you appear more confident and self-aware.
• Relaxation is contagious. When you're at ease, it allows the other person to relax too, fostering a more genuine connection.

<aside> <img src="/icons/arrow-right_red.svg" alt="/icons/arrow-right_red.svg" width="40px" /> Bonus Tip: This advice isn't just for dating, it's useful in all relationships! Clearer thinking + relaxed self = better interactions overall.

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Here are more examples of identifying problems vs. decisions in dating, to clarify the concept:

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